Funny Gun Quotes

I aim to please, but sometimes I just aim.

I may be a sharpshooter, but I’m always a bit off target in life.

My gun is my best friend – it always has my back!

Guns don’t kill people, but they do make it a lot easier.

I don’t like guns, but they seem to like me.

I don’t need anger management, I just need a bigger gun.

I used to be a pacifist until I found out how much fun target practice is.

If guns had feelings, I’m sure mine would be proud of all the noise it makes.

Don’t worry, my gun’s bark is louder than its bite.

I’ve made peace with my violent tendencies – as long as no one gets hurt.

Guns are like my exes – they’re loud, difficult to handle, and I don’t bring them out in public.

When life gives you lemons, grab your gun and make some lemonade.

Sometimes I wish my gun had a ‘sarcasm’ setting.

I have a license for my guns, but they don’t have a license to kill my sense of humor.

They say laughter is the best medicine, but I think guns might be a close second.

If you can’t beat them, join them. And if you can’t join them, shoot them.

My gun never judges me like the people in my life do.

I always carry a gun because you never know when you’ll need to shoot someone with kindness.

I’ve never met a gun I didn’t like – except for the one that jammed on me during a zombie apocalypse simulation.

My gun and I have an unspoken understanding – I aim, and it pretends to hit the target.

Don’t mistake my love of guns for a lack of intelligence – I can shoot you and philosophize at the same time.

I don’t collect stamps or coins, I collect guns… In case the world ever needs a slightly deranged, gun-loving historian.

Guns don’t kill people, bullets do. So, technically, it’s the ammo’s fault.

My gun may be small, but my aim is big.

I’m like a shooting star – unpredictable and just a little bit dangerous.

I always worry that if guns could talk, mine would rat me out.

My gun is a lot like my ex – it always leaves a mess for me to clean up.

I may not have the best aim, but at least my gunshots make for great sound effects.

They say guns are bad for your health, but they’ve certainly improved my aim.

I don’t always shoot to kill, but when I do, it’s usually with a Nerf gun.

My gun is like a loyal dog – always by my side and ready to fetch trouble.

I don’t need an alarm clock, the sound of gunfire is my wake-up call.

I used to believe in gun control, until I realized I needed it to hit the target.

My gun is like my favorite pair of jeans – it fits just right and makes me feel confident.

Some people have a guardian angel, I have a guardian gun.

I’m not a violent person, but my gun makes me feel invincible. And maybe a little bit crazy.

I don’t always carry a gun, but when I do, it’s usually because I forgot to lock my front door.

My aim is as good as my jokes – unpredictable and often off target.

I may be small, but my gun has a big personality.

If you ever need someone to help you hit the bullseye, I’m your girl. Just make sure to bring your own gun.

I’ve found that a gun can solve all of life’s problems – or at least distract you from them for a while.

They say guns don’t solve problems, but they do solve my boredom.

I don’t need a superhero cape, just give me a gun and I’ll protect the world my own way.

Guns are like tattoos – addictive, a little bit rebellious, and often regrettable.

I don’t always carry a gun, but when I do, it’s usually because I’m going to a pirate-themed party.

My guns are like my children – they’re loud, expensive, and I have to clean up after them.

Some people find my love of guns disturbing, but I find their fear of inanimate objects even more disturbing.

I may not be the fastest draw in the West, but I make up for it with my quick wit.

My gun is like my secret weapon – it keeps me entertained during awkward small talk.

I don’t always shoot straight, but I always shoot with style.