Office Space Quotes

I have people skills, I am good at dealing with people.

I’m gonna need you to go ahead and come in on Saturday.

I could set the building on fire.

I believe you have my stapler.

You know what they say, Bob, it’s not the years in your life, but the life in your years.

I’m not sure I agree with you a hundred percent on your police work there, Lou.

Looks like you’ve been missing a lot of work lately. I wouldn’t say I’ve been missing it, Bob.

I’m a people person, dammit!

I’m not a religious man, but if you’re up there, save me, Superman!

I don’t like my job, and I don’t think I’m gonna go anymore.

What would you say you do here?

Just remember, if you hang in there long enough, good things can happen in this world.

Is this some sort of sick joke?

I try to do nothing as much as possible.

I’m gonna need those TPS reports ASAP.

It’s not that I’m lazy, it’s that I just don’t care.

I was told there’d be cake.

I’m a self-starter. I don’t need someone to motivate me.

The thing is, Bob, it’s not that I’m lazy, it’s that I just don’t care.

I’m going to need you to come in on Sunday too.

I don’t think I’m cut out for this management thing.

I’m not a great follower, I prefer to be the boss.

Looks like somebody’s got a case of the Mondays.

I work hard, I just don’t like to show it.

Why should I change? He’s the one who sucks.

I’m not good with confrontations. I prefer to avoid them.

I’m sorry, but I’m not going to be able to come in today. I’ve got a problem with my TPS reports.

I’m gonna need you to go ahead and move your desk to the basement. We’re rearranging.

I’m the type of boss who is always willing to listen to new ideas. As long as they’re the same as mine.

I’m not anti-social, I just don’t like being around people.

I’m a team player. I just prefer to play on my own team.

I’ve been with this company for 10 years and I still don’t have my own office.

I’m gonna need you to come in on Sunday. Yeah, that’d be great.

I’m not a quitter, but I’m also not going to keep doing something I hate.

I like to keep a low profile around the office. The less people notice me, the better.

I’m not one for small talk. Let’s get straight to business.

I’ve come to the realization that I don’t want a corporate ladder to climb. I want a hammock.

I’m not sure what this company does. And I’m not sure if anyone else does either.

I’m gonna need a raise. I’m doing the work of three people here.

I’m not good with deadlines. I prefer to take my time and do things right.

I’ve learned that you can’t please everyone. Especially in an office environment.

I’m not interested in office politics. I prefer to stay out of the drama.

I’m not a perfectionist, I just have high standards.

I’m the type of employee who likes to take initiative. Even if it means stepping on a few toes.

I’m not a morning person, but I’ll make an exception for coffee.

I’m gonna need you to go ahead and take care of that for me. Thanks.

I’m not good at multitasking. I prefer to give all my attention to one thing at a time.

I’m the type of coworker who will always have your back. As long as you have mine.

I’m not interested in climbing the corporate ladder. I’m more interested in building my own empire.

I’m gonna need you to go ahead and cancel all my meetings for the rest of the day. I’ve got a case of the office blues.