NBA Funny Quotes
They say basketball is a game of inches, but I need all the inches I can get!
I was dribbling so fast, the ball filed for a restraining order!
I can’t jump high enough to touch the top of the backboard, but I can definitely touch the bottom!
Sometimes I dribble so much, I start to forget which way the basket is!
I’m not a great shooter, but I can definitely shoot my shot with confidence!
I may not have the best handles, but I’ve never met a turnover I didn’t like!
If layups were worth 10 points, I’d be an MVP for sure!
I once airballed a dunk, but hey, at least I made it on SportsCenter!
My crossover is so deadly, I’ve been warned by the FBI for breaking ankles!
I’ve never met a mid-range shot I didn’t hate!
Who needs a jump shot when you can break the laws of physics and shoot from half-court?
I’m not clutch, but I can definitely come up with some clutch excuses!
I may not have the best rebounding technique, but I can definitely box out my competition at the buffet!
They say defense wins championships, but I’m still waiting for that to work in my favor!
I may not be the tallest player, but I make up for it with my height in confidence!
When the game is on the line, I’m the first to volunteer to be the waterboy!
I’ve never met a shot I didn’t think I could make – even if it’s from the parking lot!
I once fouled out in the first quarter – a true MVP moment!
My vertical leap is so low, I once got blocked by a blade of grass!
They may call it traveling, but I call it exploring new horizons!
I may not be the fastest player, but I once outran a snail in a 40-yard dash!
I may not be able to dunk, but I can definitely hang on the rim and pretend!
I once shot a free throw so badly, it went backwards and hit the referee! Needless to say, I got ejected.
When it comes to defense, I’m like a Swiss cheese – full of holes!
My shooting percentage may be low, but my confidence level is off the charts!
I’ve mastered the art of flopping so well, I could audition for a role in Hollywood!
I’m not a great passer, but I can definitely throw a mean chest pass straight into the stands!
Who needs handles when you can just wave your arms around and hope for the best?
I once got a technical foul for excessive celebration after tying my shoes!
I may not have the best basketball IQ, but I’m a genius when it comes to post-game snacks!
I once missed a layup so badly, it hit a fan in the front row – they were not impressed!
I may not have a signature move, but I can definitely shuffle my feet and call it ‘the worm!’
They say practice makes perfect, but I’m still waiting for perfection to arrive!
I once got called for traveling on a fast break – apparently, my speed was too much for the refs to handle!
I’ve taken so many bad shots, I should have a photography exhibition!
I’ve never met a teammate I didn’t accidentally elbow in the face – it’s a gift!
I may not be the most stylish player, but my socks game is always on point!
They say you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take, but I’m pretty good at proving them wrong!
I once fouled out and got a technical foul in the same play – it’s a talent!
I can dribble so fast, I once lost control of the ball and it hit the mascot – he wasn’t happy!
Who needs a three-point shot when you can just shoot from the half-court line and hope for the best?
I may not have the best court vision, but I have exceptional peripheral vision for spotting snacks on the sideline!
I’ve been known to shoot airballs in my sleep – that’s dedication!
I once got called for a foul while sitting on the bench – I guess my intensity was too much for the referees to handle!
I may not have the best shooting form, but I can definitely break a few mirrors with my accuracy!
I once got blocked by the net – apparently, it didn’t appreciate my dunk attempt!
I’m not a great 3-point shooter, but I can definitely hit the side of the backboard like nobody’s business!
I once got confused and tried to inbound the ball to the mascot – needless to say, we didn’t score!
I may not have the best vertical leap, but I make up for it with my horizontal leap!
I’m not the most technically skilled player, but I make up for it with enthusiasm and a great celebration dance!