Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. – Benjamin Franklin
I drink to make other people interesting. – George Jean Nathan
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
Beer, because no good story starts with someone eating a salad.
I’m on a beer diet; I’ve lost three days already.
Beer: Nature’s way of showing us that there is still reason to smile even after a hard day.
In dog beers, I’ve only had one.
I’m not an alcoholic, I’m a beer enthusiast.
I started running because I wanted to lose weight. But then I discovered beer and pizza.
I have a beer gut. It’s a protective covering for my six-pack.
Beer: because no great story starts with ‘So, I was eating a salad…’
I can’t decide if I need a hug, a large coffee, or three beers.
Beer: The reason I wake up every afternoon.
Beer is like the perfect family member; it can always make you feel better about your own life choices.
Beer is the answer. What was the question again?
Beer: Because you don’t make great friends with salad.
I’ve done some pretty stupid things in my life. Thankfully, alcohol was there to provide the laughter.
Beer is a constant reminder that life is better when you’re not taking it too seriously.
Step aside coffee, this is a job for beer.
I don’t get drunk, I get awesome.
I’m not a heavy drinker, I’m a heavy thinker with a beer.
Here’s to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life’s problems. – Homer Simpson
Beer: It’s not alcoholism if you’re classy about it.
Save water, drink beer.
Don’t worry, beer happy.
Beer goggles: Making ugly people more attractive since the invention of beer.
Beer: Helping ugly people have sex since ancient times.
Beer: because what’s the point of living if it’s not to drink beer?
I don’t have a drinking problem, I have a ‘thirst for adventure’ problem.
Beer: the cause of, and solution to, all of life’s problems.
Beer: Because you can’t drink bacon.
I’m not an alcoholic, I’m a barley connoisseur.
I’m in a committed relationship with beer.
I’m not boozing, I’m exploring the brewery scene.
I don’t drink to forget, I drink to remember what a good time is like.
Beer: The only dad bod I want.
I don’t need therapy, I just need a cold beer and good company.
Beer: It’s like saying, ‘Hey, life, I’m just gonna do me.’
Beer: because no great story ever started with someone eating a salad.
Beer: It’s the best wingman you could ever ask for.
Beer: A constant reminder that there’s always a silver (stout) lining.
I’m not an alcoholic, I’m just a professional beer taster.
I’m on a strict beer diet: I just drink beer and it’s working.
Beer: The perfect accessory for a fulfilling life.
I’m not drunk, I’m just happier than you.
I’m not a beer snob, I’m a beer enthusiast with high standards.
All you need is love, but a little beer now and then doesn’t hurt.
A balanced diet is having a beer in each hand.
Beer: helping introverts talk about things they don’t care about since 1842.
I don’t always drink beer, but when I do, I prefer a lot of it.
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