Humor Funny Beer Quotes

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. – Benjamin Franklin

I drink to make other people interesting. – George Jean Nathan

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

Beer, because no good story starts with someone eating a salad.

I’m on a beer diet; I’ve lost three days already.

Beer: Nature’s way of showing us that there is still reason to smile even after a hard day.

In dog beers, I’ve only had one.

I’m not an alcoholic, I’m a beer enthusiast.

I started running because I wanted to lose weight. But then I discovered beer and pizza.

I have a beer gut. It’s a protective covering for my six-pack.

Beer: because no great story starts with ‘So, I was eating a salad…’

I can’t decide if I need a hug, a large coffee, or three beers.

Beer: The reason I wake up every afternoon.

Beer is like the perfect family member; it can always make you feel better about your own life choices.

Beer is the answer. What was the question again?

Beer: Because you don’t make great friends with salad.

I’ve done some pretty stupid things in my life. Thankfully, alcohol was there to provide the laughter.

Beer is a constant reminder that life is better when you’re not taking it too seriously.

Step aside coffee, this is a job for beer.

I don’t get drunk, I get awesome.

I’m not a heavy drinker, I’m a heavy thinker with a beer.

Here’s to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life’s problems. – Homer Simpson

Beer: It’s not alcoholism if you’re classy about it.

Save water, drink beer.

Don’t worry, beer happy.

Beer goggles: Making ugly people more attractive since the invention of beer.

Beer: Helping ugly people have sex since ancient times.

Beer: because what’s the point of living if it’s not to drink beer?

I don’t have a drinking problem, I have a ‘thirst for adventure’ problem.

Beer: the cause of, and solution to, all of life’s problems.

Beer: Because you can’t drink bacon.

I’m not an alcoholic, I’m a barley connoisseur.

I’m in a committed relationship with beer.

I’m not boozing, I’m exploring the brewery scene.

I don’t drink to forget, I drink to remember what a good time is like.

Beer: The only dad bod I want.

I don’t need therapy, I just need a cold beer and good company.

Beer: It’s like saying, ‘Hey, life, I’m just gonna do me.’

Beer: because no great story ever started with someone eating a salad.

Beer: It’s the best wingman you could ever ask for.

Beer: A constant reminder that there’s always a silver (stout) lining.

I’m not an alcoholic, I’m just a professional beer taster.

I’m on a strict beer diet: I just drink beer and it’s working.

Beer: The perfect accessory for a fulfilling life.

I’m not drunk, I’m just happier than you.

I’m not a beer snob, I’m a beer enthusiast with high standards.

All you need is love, but a little beer now and then doesn’t hurt.

A balanced diet is having a beer in each hand.

Beer: helping introverts talk about things they don’t care about since 1842.

I don’t always drink beer, but when I do, I prefer a lot of it.