Spiderman Funny Quotes – Hilarious One-Liners from Your Friendly Neighborhood Superhero

With great power comes great responsibility, and a really cool costume.

You know you’re a superhero when you can stick to walls and no one asks you why.

Being a superhero is like being a circus performer with really good reflexes.

Spiderman: the only one who can fight crime and make puns at the same time.

I may not have a web shooter, but I’ve got a web of jokes to catch the bad guys.

I’m not just a spider-themed superhero, I also do well at parties as a human pinata.

People always ask me how I became Spiderman, but nobody ever asks me how I became such a good dancer.

Who needs a cape when you’ve got a spider suit? It’s like having eight capes.

Sorry, ladies, I can only go out on dates that don’t involve climbing tall buildings.

Being Spiderman comes with a lot of responsibilities, like fighting crime and keeping my outfit wrinkle-free.

Just when you think you’ve caught all the criminals, there’s always someone else trying to steal my spotlight.

If you’re going to be a superhero, you better have a sense of humor. Otherwise, it’s just spandex and punching.

Some superheroes fly, some superheroes have super strength. Me? I can just stick to things.

Sometimes being a superhero means sacrificing your social life, but at least I’ve got a cool secret identity.

Superheroes have it tough, but as Spiderman, I’m pretty much covered in tough.

Spiderman: the only superhero who can give you a high five and leave you stuck to a wall.

I’m not afraid to admit it: I’m a superhero because I really hate spiders.

If you can’t beat ’em, web ’em.

I’d love to fly like other superheroes, but I’m too afraid of heights. At least I’ve got sticky hands.

Saving the world is hard, but it’s nothing compared to trying to pick up someone else’s sticky web.

Who needs a car when you can just swing through the city? Gas prices can’t catch me.

With my web-slinging abilities, my enemies can’t out-run me, but they can make fun of my costume.

If being a superhero doesn’t work out, at least I can get a job at a spider exhibit.

Spiderman- the best at catching bad guys and catching flies at the same time.

I never skip leg day, because with great legs comes great superpowers.

If Spiderman had a catchphrase, it would definitely be ‘web you later.’

My superpower may not be the most impressive, but at least I’ll never lose my keys again.

Being a superhero is like being a celebrity, except I don’t get paid and I have to wear tights.

I’ve got the agility of a spider, the strength of a spider, and the social skills of a spider.

Being a superhero is a lot like being a spider: always needing to avoid getting squished.

Sometimes people call me a bug when I’m saving the day. But bugs don’t stick to walls, now do they?

Spiders have it easy: all they have to do is sit in a web and wait for dinner. Me? I have to chase down bad guys.

They say ‘the early bird gets the worm,’ but as Spiderman, I can catch any bird and still have time for brunch.

If the Avengers were a band, I’d definitely be the one playing the tambourine.

Spiderman: the only superhero who can get tangled up in their own costume and still save the day.

I may be a superhero, but I’ll still scream if I see a mouse. It’s a spider thing.

Looking good in spandex is half the battle. The other half is taking down bad guys.

Who needs a gym membership when you can just swing through the city and do pull-ups?

When people say ‘I can’t believe my eyes,’ I take it as a compliment.

I’ve been called a lot of things, but ‘friendly neighborhood Spiderman’ is my favorite.

Being a superhero means never having to carry your own groceries. Web-slinging is a great way to save on delivery fees.

One of the perks of being Spiderman is never getting stuck in traffic. Swinging through the city is pretty time-efficient.

I may be a hero, but I can still appreciate the value of a good sale. Crimefighting doesn’t come cheap, you know.

One of the downsides of being a superhero is constantly getting my webs tangled. You’d think they would come with instructions.

If I had a dollar for every time someone asked me to take down a spider in their house, I’d be a spider billionaire.

When I was bitten by a radioactive spider, I didn’t realize my life would become such a sticky situation.

Sometimes being a superhero means sacrificing your personal life. I guess that’s why I’m still single.

It’s not easy being a superhero. You’ve got to have a lot of conviction and a lot of wrinkle spray for your costume.

Being Spiderman means always being on call. Crime doesn’t take a vacation, and neither can I.

They say ‘every cloud has a silver lining,’ but as Spiderman, I’m more interested in the clouds that look like spiders.