Jerk Quotes and Sayings: Insights From Unexpected Sources

A jerk is a guy who steals your heart only to give it back broken.

Somedays it feels like all you can do is put your head down, and tolerate the jerks.

In the land of jerks, the considerate person is king.

Life’s too short to waste time with jerks.

Every group has that one jerk who just doesn’t get it, don’t be that jerk.

Sometimes the biggest jerks are those who don’t even realize they are.

Life always introduces us to the occasional jerk to remind us how not to act.

Often, it’s not the major disasters that make us jerks, but the minor inconveniences.

The world is full of jerks, you don’t have to be one of them.

Being a jerk is a luxury that not everyone can afford.

The difference between a jerk and a hero is perspective.

Even jerks deserve a second chance, but not a third.

A perk in life is not being a jerk.

Don’t be a jerk, it’s completely unnecessary.

In the game of life, don’t be the jerk everyone hates to play with.

Remember, a jerk is just a nice person who has had a bad day.

If you run into a jerk in the morning, you ran into a jerk. If you run into jerks all day, you’re the jerk. – Raylan Givens

A jerk will always underestimate you. That’s what makes him a jerk.

Don?t be a jerk; don?t take this incredible world for granted.

Words hurt, don’t be a jerk.

I’m not a jerk, I just have high standards for people who can’t meet them.

Sorry for the mean, awful, accurate things I said.

It’s always better to lose a lover than love a loser.

I?m not insulting you. I?m describing you.

Maybe you should eat some makeup so you can be pretty on the inside too.

I was going to give you a nasty look but I see you already have one.

Keep rolling your eyes, maybe you?ll find a brain back there.

I?m not saying I hate you, what I?m saying is that you are literally the Monday of my life.

I just stepped in something that was smarter than you… and smelled better too.

In order for you to insult me, I would first have to value your opinion.

I don?t have the energy to pretend I like you today.

I?m sorry for the things I said when it was winter.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have five fingers and the middle one is for you.

I’m busy right now, can I ignore you some other time?

Insulting you would be inconsequential ? nature has already done a fine job.

Sorry, I can?t hangout. My uncle?s cousin?s sister in law?s best friend?s insurance agent?s roommate?s pet goldfish died. Maybe next time.

My cell phone is acting up, I keep pressing the home button but when I look around, I’m still at work.

My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I’m right.

You bring everyone so much joy when you leave the room.

I’d agree with you but then we’d both be wrong.

Some people are living examples of why we need a dummy?s guide to life.

Don’t let one jerk ruin your entire day. Remember, there are billions more.

Your level of jerkness is directly proportional to the size of the anger cloud over my head.

Pay no mind to the jerks in life, they’re simply road bumps on your path to greatness.

A jerk is someone who’d prefer to bring you down, instead of bringing you up.

I don’t build walls around my heart because of jerks. I simply learn how to pour hot oil over the attack.

What’s the difference between a jerk and the universe? The universe doesn’t think it’s the center!

A jerk is just a trophy you collect when you don’t win the lottery of good company.

One’s lack of jerkness can never overcome the strength of one’s character.

The only thing we have in common is that we both think you?re a jerk.

You know, there’s a word for guys like you, but in polite company we use ‘jerk’.

Naming a jerk doesn?t necessarily make you a jerk, but it does make them a jerk.

No jerk has the right to tamper with the glow of your soul.

In the dictionary of life, you’ll find ‘Jerk’ lodged somewhere between ‘Jeopardy’ and ‘Jigsaw’.

No matter how rich, talented or intelligent you are, being a jerk shows how poor you really are.