Funny Valentine Quotes to Make You Smile

Love is grand, but chocolate is even sweeter!

I’m single and ready to mingle this Valentine’s Day!

They say love is blind, but my dating history suggests otherwise.

I’m allergic to cheesy Valentine’s Day gestures; get me pizza instead!

My true love this Valentine’s Day? Netflix and my favorite pajamas.

Roses are red, violets are blue, if you don’t bring chocolates, this date is through!

Valentine’s Day is just a reminder that I’m still waiting for my Hogwarts acceptance letter.

I’m sorry, I can’t make any plans for Valentine’s Day – I have a hot date with a tub of ice cream.

Love may be a battlefield, but my exes were more like landmines.

Valentine’s Day is just a conspiracy between greeting card companies and florists to empty our wallets.

If love is a drug, then Valentine’s Day is just an overdose waiting to happen.

Instead of a dozen roses, I’d prefer a dozen donuts this Valentine’s Day.

Relationship status this Valentine’s Day: eating a heart-shaped pizza, no regrets.

The key to a successful Valentine’s Day? Low expectations.

Who needs a Valentine when you have a pet that loves you unconditionally?

My love language is sarcasm, so this Valentine’s Day, prepare for some witty banter.

Valentine’s Day is great and all, but have you ever tried eating a whole box of chocolates by yourself?

Funny Valentine Quotes to Make You Smile part 2

Roses are red, violets are blue, who needs a date when I’ve got WiFi too?

My love life is like a romantic comedy – without the romance, just the comedy part.

Valentine’s Day is the perfect excuse to embrace my inner cat lady.

Valentine’s Day is just another reminder to update my dating profile.

I may not have a Valentine, but I have a great sense of humor – that counts, right?

Valentine’s Day is the perfect time to appreciate all the single people in our lives.

Love is in the air this Valentine’s Day – along with a hint of desperation and discount chocolates.

Valentine’s Day is the only day I’m allowed to consume an entire heart-shaped box of chocolates guilt-free.

They say love is blind, but my bank account can see all those expensive Valentine’s Day gifts.

Peace, love, and awkward Valentine’s Day exchanges.

I’m not single, I’m just in a long-term relationship with freedom and independence.

Cupid must have missed with his arrow because my love life is non-existent.

Valentine’s Day: the one day I can dress up and pretend I have a love life for a couple of hours.

Valentine’s Day is great for couples, but even better for discounted chocolates the day after.

Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again with a heart-shaped pizza?

Who needs a Valentine’s Day date when I can have a DIY spa day and a glass of wine?

Valentine’s Day is a reminder that I need a dog who loves me unconditionally, with no expectations of grand gestures.

Instead of sending me flowers, just Venmo me the money so I can order takeout.

Valentine’s Day should come with a warning: excessive cheesiness may cause indigestion.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I’ll be my own Valentine because I deserve it too!

Being single on Valentine’s Day just means I have extra money to treat myself – win-win!

All you need is love… and a good sense of humor to survive this Valentine’s Day.

Valentine’s Day is just a reminder of all the exes I’m grateful I don’t have to buy gifts for.

Can you be my Valentine? I promise not to write any cringeworthy poems about roses and love.

Who needs a romantic candlelit dinner when you can have a candlelit bubble bath instead?

If love is blind, why are lingerie stores so popular on Valentine’s Day?

Roses are red, violets are blue, I’m spending Valentine’s Day watching rom-coms for two.

Valentine’s Day is the one holiday I can fully embrace being single and fabulous!