Funny Horse Sayings to Brighten Your Day

I don’t have an attitude problem. I just have a personality you can’t handle, similar to my horse.

I’ve spent most of my life riding horses. The rest I’ve just wasted.

Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people.

A horse is like a best friend. They’re always there to nuzzle you and make your life a better place.

Horses leave hoof prints on your heart – and your clothes, car, house…

My horse’s stable is cleaner than my room.

Sure, my ride moves in mysterious ways – you should see it counter canter!

Why don’t horses write their memoirs? Because they’re afraid they’ll be saddled with the truth!

My horse’s buck is so powerful, we’ve just been offered a contract in the rodeo.

If you think I’m high maintenance, you should see my horse!

Life is short, buy the horse.

Who needs a knight in shining armor? A knight on a horse is even better!

Most girls wanted a pony growing up. I wanted the whole ranch.

Horses are my therapy!

A horse doesn’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.

In case of emergency: Save the horse first!

Every time I say the word ‘diet’, I wash my mouth out with chocolate and saddle soap!

Keep calm and let your horse do the neigh-ing.

My horse talks back… thankfully, his words are pretty unbridled.

Horse girl energy is always in full gallop!

I consider every horse a philosopher because they know more about life than human does.

When a horse greets you with a nicker and regards you with a large and liquid eye, it?s over.

You can’t lead a horse to water, but you can definitely lead them to the hay!

Horses: If God made anything more beautiful, he kept it for himself.

If you think I’m cute, you should see my horse!

My horse doesn’t care how much money I have, as long as I have carrots.

Horses: because people are just irritating!

Horse girls don’t have attitude, we?re just born with a lot of horse pizazz!

Behind every successful person is a horse.

Love is… turning on the barn light and hearing a welcoming neigh.

Horses ? because when life gets complicated, they make it simple again.

I don?t ride a horse to be pretty. I ride a horse to scare people.

If love can?t cure it, horses will.

A horse doesn’t care how much you know until he knows how much you care.

If you want a stable friendship, get a horse!

Being on a horse is like flying in your dreams.

Friends come and go, but barn buddies are forever.

My horse is perfect, I?m the one still in training.

Brooms are for cleaning… horses are for sweeping you off your feet.

What does my horse think? Apples are forever, people are temporary.

I’ve often said there’s nothing better for the inside of a man than the outside of a horse.

Life is a lot like a horse; it can be tough to handle, but the ride is worth it.

Some people call me crazy. I prefer the term ‘horse-aholic’.

A horse doesn’t care how much you know until he knows how much you care.

Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people.

Gallop ahead to your dreams, just like a horse.

You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him participate in synchronized swimming.

Take life’s hurdles in stride! Loose horse shoes aren’t lucky at all.

It’s hard to lead a cavalry charge if you think you look funny on a horse.

A stubborn horse walks behind you, an impatient horse walks in front of you, but a noble companion walks beside you.

Putting the cart before the horse? That?s one way to stay ahead of the game.

Quit horsing around! Unless, of course, it’s time for fun.

A horse is the projection of people’s dreams about themselves – strong, powerful, beautiful.

Ride your horse like it’s the last gallop, neigh like no one is listening, and find a way to stable where there is no path.

Keep calm and horse on; there ain’t no hurdle too high nor ditch too deep.

Horse cookies? I used to eat those for breakfast!

Horses keep manure real, footloose and pony-free.

Too much horsepower? No such thing!

A horse can lend its rider the speed and strength he or she lacks?but the rider who is wise remembers it is no more than a loan.

I’m in stable relationships only; I’ve got my mare, my colt, and my pony.