Funny Duck Quotes

Why did the duck get a pedicure? Because it had webbed feet!

What do ducks watch on TV? Duck-umentaries!

How do ducks know what time it is? They look at their quack!

Why did the duck become a comedian? It had a great sense of quack!

What did one duck say to the other? ‘I don’t know, I don’t speak duck!’

Why don’t ducks make good detectives? They always quack the case!

Why did the duck bring an umbrella? To quack the rain away!

What do ducks study in school? The mallards of education!

Why did the duck go to the psychiatrist? It had a lot of quacke to deal with!

What’s a duck’s favorite TV show? Duck Dynasty!

Why did the duck bring a ladder to the bar? It wanted to reach new quack-tails!

What’s a duck’s favorite type of music? Beak-boxing!

Why don’t ducks ever judge each other? Because they all have their own unique quack-ters!

What do you call a duck with no wings? A ground-quacker!

Why did the duck always carry a pencil and paper? It wanted to quack down notes!

What do you call a duck that steals? A duck-plicate!

Why did the duck cross the playground? To get to the other slide!

What do you get when you cross a duck and a computer? A quack-intosh!

Why did the duck join a band? It had a great set of quack-sticks!

What do ducks wear to parties? Feathers and quacktail dresses!

Why do ducks never tell secrets? They’re always quacking!

What’s a duck’s favorite type of game? Duck, duck, goose!

Why was the duck a good student? It always did its quackwork!

What do you call a duck that loves to surf? A wave-quacker!

Why don’t ducks like to eat tacos? They can’t handle the quack-sauce!

What do you call a duck that’s going through a midlife crisis? A quack-pot!

Why did the duck start a new diet? It wanted to quack some pounds!

What’s a duck’s favorite dessert? Apple quacking pie!

Why did the duck bring a map to the pond? It didn’t want to get lost in quack-istan!

What do ducks do when they’re excited? They quack out in joy!

Why was the duck always the center of attention? It had a great quack-titude!

What’s a duck’s favorite type of exercise? Wing-aling!

Why did the duck become a chef? It always had a quack for cooking!

What’s a duck’s favorite type of car? A quack-rolet!

Why did the duck invite its friends over for a party? It wanted to quack the night away!

What’s a duck’s favorite type of dance? The quackstep!

Why did the duck go to art school? It had a talent for quack-ture!

What do you call a duck that loves to play video games? A quacktendo!

What did one duck say to the other when it was lost? ‘Do you have a quack-gle maps?’

Why don’t ducks like to go on roller coasters? They’re afraid of the quack-drops!

What’s a duck’s favorite type of exercise equipment? A quack-master!

Why did the duck become a lawyer? It had a talent for quack-litigation!

What’s a duck’s favorite sport? Water polo!

Why did the duck go to space? To quack out of this world!

What do you get when you cross a duck and a ghost? A quack-stor!

Why did the duck join a band? It had a great quack-tar solo!

Why did the duck always carry a map? It liked to quack out new territories!

What do you call a duck that loves to karaoke? A quack-tress!

Why don’t ducks ever tell jokes? They’re always quack-ed up!

What’s a duck’s favorite type of book? A quack-tionary!