Famous and Memorable Skyrim Guard Quotes

No lollygaggin’.

Let me guess… someone stole your sweet roll.

Wait… I know you.

I used to be an adventurer like you, then I took an arrow in the knee.

Stop right there, criminal scum!

Everything’s in order.

Got a lot of steel to shape.

Watch the skies, traveler.

My cousin’s out fighting dragons, and what do I get? Guard duty.

Disrespect the law, and you disrespect me.

The Jarl’s justice can be swift.

Don’t suppose you’d enchant my sword? Dull old blade can barely cut butter.

Thor’s mercy be upon you, for the Vigil has none to spare.

You see those warriors from Hammerfell? They?ve got curved swords. Curved. Swords.

Stay out of trouble, or there’s gonna be trouble.

What is it? Dragons?

Pssst. Hey, I know who you are. Hail Sithis!

Staying safe, I hope?

What’s the hurry?

By the order of the Jarl, stop right there!

I used to be an adventurer like you, then I took an arrow to the knee.

Let me guess… someone stole your sweetroll.

No lollygagging.

My cousin’s out fighting dragons, and what do I get? Guard duty.

Disrespect the law, and you disrespect me.

Don’t suppose you’d enchant my sword? Dull old blade can barely cut butter.

Stormcloaks, Imperials, dragons. Ain’t no matter to me what I kill. Let them come.

They say Ulfric Stormcloak murdered the High King… with his voice!

Psst. Hey, I know who you are. Hail Sithis!

Is that… fur? Coming out of your ears?

Worship of Talos is strictly forbidden.

The gods gave you two hands, and you use them both for your weapon. I can respect that.

Go cast your fancy magic someplace else.

You have the scent of the wild about you.

If it’s a fight you want, I’m ready this time.

Wait… I know you.

Keep your blade clean, we don’t want blood stains on our ‘law’ here.

Dragons I can handle. But this talk of dragons? World gone mad, I say.

What is it? Dragons?

Everything’s in order.

I used to be an adventurer like you, then I took an arrow in the knee.

No lollygagging.

My cousin’s out fighting dragons, and what do I get? Guard duty.

Let me guess… someone stole your sweetroll?

Dragons I can handle. But this talk of dragons? World gone mad, I say.

Go cast your fancy magic someplace else.

Now ain’t this a surprise!

The gods gave you two hands, and you use them both for your weapon. I can respect that.

Wait… I know you.

Everything alright?

Don?t suppose you?d enchant my sword? The old blade can barely cut butter.

You have committed crimes against Skyrim and her people, what say you in your defense?

Disrespect the law, and you disrespect me.

What is it? Dragons?

They say Ulfric Stormcloak murdered the high king with his voice. Shouted him apart.

Stay out of trouble, elf.

Got to thinking…maybe I’m the Dragonborn and I just don’t know it yet.

By order of the yarl, stop right there!

Stormcloaks, Imperials, dragons, ain’t no matter to me what I kill. Let them come.

Guard might get nervous, a man approaches with his weapon drawn.