Birds of a feather flock together… until someone brings out the birdseed!
Why did the chicken go to the seance? To talk to the other side!
Why did the pigeon bring a suitcase? Because it wanted to ‘fly’ in style!
Why was the hummingbird always getting in trouble? It couldn’t stop ‘buzzing’ around!
Why did the pelican refuse to pay for its meal? It thought it would get it ‘billed’ later!
What do you call a parrot that flew away? A polygon!
Why did the owl start a band? Because it had perfect ‘night’ vision!
What do you get when you cross a bird with a horse? A neigh-sayer!
Why did the flamingo choose such a long neck? It wanted to reach for the ‘sky’!
Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay, they would be ‘bagels’!
Why did the ostrich become a stand-up comedian? It didn’t want its job to be a ‘big bird’
What do you call a bird that can fix anything? A tou-can-do!
Why do flamingos always lift one leg? Because if they lifted both, they would ‘fall-ingo’!
What do you call a bird that becomes a famous detective? Sherlock ‘Tweet’!
Why did the robin become a barber? It wanted to ‘trim’ branches!
Why did the bird start a delivery service? It wanted to ‘wing’ packages!
Why did the duck join the math club? It wanted to improve its ‘quack-tice’!
What’s a bird’s favorite type of exercise? Tweet-yoga!
Why did the eagle get a job at the bank? It wanted to learn to ‘soar’ finances!
Why did the turkey refuse to go to a music concert? It thought it would just be a bunch of ‘fowl’ notes!
What do you call a bird that tells jokes? A jay-ster!
What do you call a bird that procrastinates? A ‘can’t-be-bothered’!
Why did the chicken cross the road… and then go back? It forgot its ‘feathers’!
What do you call a seagull that flies over the bay? A bagel thief!
Why did the duck join the circus? It wanted to be a master of ‘quack-robatics’!
Why did the parrot go to the doctor? It was ‘tweet-ing’ too much!
What do you call a bird that delivers mail? A ‘post-al’ carrier!
Why did the peacock go to drama school? It wanted to ‘feather’ its acting career!
What do you call a bird with a fancy wardrobe? A ‘fly’-shionista!
Why did the bird bring a ladder to the party? It wanted to ‘rise’ to the occasion!
What do you call a bird that works in a mine? A canary-ologist!
Why did the penguin become a scientist? It was tired of being a ‘bird’-brain!
What do you call a bird that can play instruments? A ‘tweet’-er of music!
Why did the chicken go to the seashore? It wanted to soak up some ‘sun-chicken’!
What do you call a bird that’s good at math? An aplus-tor!
Why did the eagle sit on a clock? It wanted to be a ‘time-flyer’!
What do you call a bird that can’t stop talking? A ‘fee’-noisy!
Why did the pelican bring a umbrella to the beach? Because it heard it would be a ‘splash’ hit!
What do you call a bird with a broken wing? A ‘no-fly’ zone!
Why did the duck become a magician? It wanted to ‘quack’ people up!
What do you call a bird that loves to clean? A ‘tweet’-y maid!
Why did the parrot open a hair salon? It wanted to create ‘fly’-styles!
What do you call a bird that can’t sing? A ‘tuneless’-can!
Why did the seagull bring a towel to the party? It wanted to ‘wing’ it at the beach!
What do you call a bird that loves roller coasters? A ‘tweet’-seeker!
Why did the owl start a restaurant? It heard it would be a ‘hoot’!
What do you call a bird that never gets lost? A ‘navi’-gator!
Why did the flamingo join the salsa dance class? It wanted to ‘flam-ing-go’!
What do you call a bird that can write? A ‘tweet’-ing author!
Why did the canary become a lifeguard? It wanted to rescue ‘pool’ souls!
Yahoo financial quotes: Unlocking the power of numbers for informed investing.Numbers don't lie: Yahoo financial…
Yahoo Finance: Where money and information meet.Tracking my recent quotes on Yahoo Finance for a…
Brackets in quotes add clarity to your writing.Using brackets in quotes can help to clarify…
According to...In the words of...As stated by...In reference to...Quoting from...As articulated by...Echoing...To quote...In the opinion…
In the words of Albert Einstein, 'Imagination is more important than knowledge.'As Maya Angelou once…
Mla block quotes are the secret weapon of academic writers.Block quotes in MLA format: adding…