Funny Valentine’s Day Quotes to Lighten the Mood

Love is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re gonna get, unless it’s Valentine’s Day and you’re on a diet.

Roses are red, violets are blue, Valentine’s Day is great, unless you’re single too.

Love is in the air, but so is the flu, so wash your hands and don’t get sick on Valentine’s Day too!

Valentine’s Day is the perfect excuse to eat all the chocolate without feeling guilty.

If love is blind, then why are all the Valentine’s Day cards so cheesy?

My love for you is like pi, never-ending and irrational.

Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, but not as sweet as you… unless you stole my chocolate.

Dear Cupid, please shoot an arrow through my ex’s heart, just for Valentine’s Day.

Valentine’s Day is like a box of chocolates, if you’re single, you’re stuck with the coconut-filled ones.

The best thing about Valentine’s Day is that it reminds me how great it is to be single.

Valentine’s Day: the one day a year when using cheesy pick-up lines is socially acceptable.

If love is a battlefield, then Valentine’s Day is the ceasefire.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I don’t need romance, just give me pizza for two.

Love is like a romantic comedy, except on Valentine’s Day I get to be the director.

Valentine’s Day is the perfect time to ask, ‘What’s chocolate’s favorite dance move?’… the cocoa shuffle!

Funny Valentine’s Day Quotes to Lighten the Mood part 2

Roses are red, violets are blue, the only Valentine’s dessert I want is a whole cheesecake for two.

I love you more than chocolate, and that’s saying something on Valentine’s Day!

Who needs a Valentine when you can have a luxurious bubble bath and a glass of wine?

Being single on Valentine’s Day means you have more money to spend on chocolate the next day.

Cupid must be really bad at math because my odds of being single on Valentine’s Day are extremely high.

Valentine’s Day is just like any other day, except my social media feed is full of people holding hands.

Roses are red, violets are blue, but if I had a Valentine, I’d probably forget to get them a gift too.

Valentine’s Day: the one day a year that guarantees flowers, chocolate, and really bad poetry.

Love is like a romantic comedy movie, but on Valentine’s Day, I’m just the awkward sidekick.

Valentine’s Day: the only day of the year when it’s acceptable to leave a trail of chocolate wrappers behind you.

Roses are red, violets are blue, Valentine’s Day would be sweeter if it came with chocolate fondue.

Who needs a Valentine when you can Netflix and chill all by yourself?

Valentine’s Day is the perfect time to remember that love is a battlefield, and I’m still waiting for reinforcements.

Valentine’s Day is like a box of chocolates, you know you’re gonna regret eating the whole thing, but you do it anyway.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I might be single, but at least I don’t have to share my chocolate with you.

Love is like a rollercoaster ride, and on Valentine’s Day, I can’t even find a kid’s mini-carousel.

Valentine’s Day is a reminder that my love life is about as exciting as a white crayon.

Roses are red, violets are blue, being single on Valentine’s Day means I can spend the day binge-watching my favorite show.

Valentine’s Day: the one day a year when it’s socially acceptable to eat an entire heart-shaped pizza by yourself.

Love is like a romantic comedy, except my life is more of a horror movie on Valentine’s Day.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I can’t wait for Valentine’s Day to be over, how about you?

Valentine’s Day: the perfect time to remember that relationships are like algebra – you look at your X and wonder Y.

Love is like a fine wine, except on Valentine’s Day, it’s more like a cheap bottle of champagne.

Roses are red, violets are blue, but love is more confusing than algebra, I have no clue.

Valentine’s Day is great, but have you ever tried to find a parking spot at a popular restaurant on Valentine’s Day?

Love is like a romantic comedy, except on Valentine’s Day, I’d rather watch a horror movie.

Roses may be red, but my love for donuts is true, especially on Valentine’s Day, when they’re heart-shaped too!

Valentine’s Day: the perfect time to remember that love is patient, love is kind, and love doesn’t leave dirty dishes in the sink.

Love is like a rollercoaster ride, and on Valentine’s Day, I’m stuck in the kiddie section.

Roses are red, violets are blue, but being single on Valentine’s Day means I can eat all the chocolate I want without judgment from you.